Online dating and sexually transmitted infections are at an all time high. It's got people wondering, might they be correlated?
Umm, yeah. And maybe in more ways than you think...
For Fucks Sake
Fucking is great - keep doing it. Just try and treat your hook up how you'd treat a friend.
Being horny is completely natural, and so is doing something about that—whether that's alone, with a partner, or even a group. Orgasms are healthy. They relieve stress, help you sleep, release endorphins, reduce pain, increase blood flow to the brain, and the list goes on. They even boost our immune systems.
So, yeah, get that hook up in, there's lots of health benefits. But there can a hidden cost too, and I'm not even talking about STIs. See, back when our parents were hooking up, their best shot was to find somebody at the local bar. They were at the mercy of the local trade, and they probably saw the same people at that bar on a regular basis.
The internet has allowed us to search far and wide for sexual partners, often times exploring our fantasies in ways we could only imagine while fast forwarding through our dad's VHS collection when he wasn't home.
It's also broken down the positive aspects of our communal spaces. With our sometimes-obscure online "dating" profiles, we no longer face consequences for bad behavior. We succumb into our base desires with no consideration of the long-term effects. It's eroding many positive aspects of a community.
So, what am I suggesting?
Go hook up. If you want, it's okay to tell them you'll probably never see them again. But also, maybe tell them a little about your passions. Make the experience a little more human. Lord knows the number of men I laid naked next to and talked about starting a sexual health company.
You don't have to follow each other on Instagram, or ever talk again, but if you're going to exchange bodily fluids, you might try exchanging a few words about who you really are while searching for your clothes to put back on. That's all.
Pumping Queer Iron
Speaking of community, NPR has a great piece about Justice Williams and their Queer Gym outside of Boston.
"[Gyms] are hyper-masculine, they're toxic, they're about an aesthetic," Williams says. "Being part of the LGBT community, I've observed and noticed that people don't feel comfortable in gyms today."
Not only is it awesome that Justice is creating a space for people to feel comfortable in, but also, it's great that there's an physical space for locals to come together.
Williams hopes trans people will eventually feel confident at any gym, but they is doing the hard work today while that's not possible.
If you're in Boston, go check out “Queer Gym” in Brookline.